Sunday, 9 December 2007

Road Block FOR RENT

Hola, I'm temporarily back. Seems i have found a little time for myself to do something I like.So, I'm at work as usual, driving around Kingston. I go down Spanish Town road, McKay Lane, Myrie Lane etc and there is all this debris. Pieces of old appliances like refrigerators and microwaves, tires etc. I couldn't help but smile to myself and i thought "rent a roadblock". You ever notice all the protests with road blocks in Jamaica have the same kind of debris; it always seems like the same piece of cardboard because they all say "WE WANT JUSTISE" no matter what the issue is (and yes i meant to type justiSe), and the same mispellings. There are always tires and there has to be an old fridge, doesn't anybody else notice this. No matter where the...

Thursday, 25 October 2007

All a Girl Needs can be found in Clarendon

As usual, i was out with my friends the other night, and i heard a guy say he's just like Clarendon, he has everything that a woman wants". I never got it, he couldnt stop laughing, nobody else got it. Eventually he caught his breath and began to explain the cause of his, we feared, never ending, laughter. Apparently Clarendon has some really suggestive names, and you'll notice them if ur mind has nothing better to do than to harp on really trivial things. Anyway let me tell you some of them...readyLong Wood- need i say more? LOLContentEndeavor/ Good EndeavourFriendshipEffortMore landBoldnessChateauCockshopRestRitches- Another important oneamong others...Just thought i'd share...You'd almost think its deliberate right. Ladies you all need to move to Claren...

Monday, 8 October 2007

New Invention- Memory Chip

I'm particularly horrible at remembering names. I will, like most people recognize your face and I think that I know you. It might not always be safe to act on this because I've seen people in the same context many times who i might not actually know, but because you've seen them so many times your brain fools you. Now it gets very embarrasing for me because people seem to always remember my name. People shouting Yakeisha from across the road and across the room and nothing, I look around and sometimes it so bad I don't even know who yelled because nobody looks familiar. NOT GOOD. I also hate it when i return to where i used to live when i was a child and people call "Yakeisha, you remember me?" Poor me. It's embarrasing, I've resorted to...

Friday, 5 October 2007

What is Going on IN the World !!!

I got this in my inbox today. I'm sure some of you have also received the same email.I am Charah Tabetha Watson a 23 year old female, who is 5 feet 5 inches of a slim built. On the night of Friday September 28, 2007, on arriving home on Shortwood Road I was brutally attacked by my sister's boy friend who also is the father of my nephew. I got home at approximately 7:30 pm I inserted my keys into the door but soon realized that the door was bolted from the inside. I knocked on the door and my eight 8 year old niece Taiye came to the window and then said "oh, it's Auntie Charah" she then unbolted the door and I entered the house. On entering the house I saw my attacker, Neto Meeks son of a prominent media personality Amina Blackwood Meeks and...

Tuesday, 2 October 2007

Ironically

You know, i started blogging as a way to soak up the extra hours i had during, after and before work and on weekends. I get all into it and now and now!I dont have time at work anymoreI dont have time before work anymoreI dont have time after work anymoreI moved and stupid stupid flow isn't setting up service where i am even though they have already run the cable...SO no internet at home which SUCKS....See now i have to run out of the office...thats all i had time to write...

Friday, 28 September 2007

Looking Back

So for the weekend i'm leaving a filler really. So here goes...Previous PostsMurphy's LawsLife of A Jamaican Taxi Part 1Life of a Jamaican Taxi Part 2Life of a Jamaican Taxi Part 3Concept of Jamaican TimeApplication for a "Goodaz"Flavoured Animal FoodSide Effects of a PainkillerEnjoy the weeke...

Monday, 24 September 2007

When Murphy Decides to Take Over Your Life

You know Murphy's Laws right? The most basic one and the one on which all others are founded pretty much says "If anything can go wrong, it will"Well lucky for me i got to experience Murphy's Laws the other day, first hand yippee (can you hear the sarcasm in my voice...sigh)So anyway, my job happens to carry me on the road everyday into the worst possible parts of Kingston, like, Waterhouse, Rae Town, Tavern, Tivoli etc etc...you get the idea. Now this is bad enough without any extra drama. Thank goodness, so far i haven't experienced anything unsavory directly resulting from being in these areas, like shoot outs etc, especially considering that i found out the other day that the only thing my job doesn't insure against is gun shot wounds....

Wednesday, 19 September 2007

I Don't Have a Clue What Title To Give This Post

I read a post by Shonari about Scary Movie Cliches the other day. I nodded my head in agreement, even commented on it. It had me thinking that scary movies are so cliche. I used to watch scary movies and think, why the heck would i be walking down a dark road at night or across campus at odd hours of the night, or down dark scary alley ways by myself at night. I always think that. That's just stupid NOBODY does that, seriously, people are more sensible than that. Right? Ha...yeah right.So here I am, the other night, wanting to go over to campus at about 7pm, when its dark out. I have to walk over to campus from where i live or charter a taxi, me nuh rich, so i opted to walk, no big deal it was only 7pm. It never hit me how much of a typical...

Sunday, 16 September 2007

Are Men Just Stupid or are Women Better Liars?

Well thats the question, are men just stupid or are they just bad liars?Unfortunately most of us, I've realized are unfaithful at least once in our lives in our relationships. Men Cheat, women cheat, but apparently women cheat better. This is a truth, it has to be because most breakups that end due to one partner finding about about the infidelity of the other, ends because the woman finds out about the man. Here is why i think men are either just stupid or women are really good at this unfaithful thing.1. Have you ever heard a guy talking to his girlfriend on the phone when he is in the c0mpany of another woman. It's quite hilarious. He automatically has the guilty sound in his voice, because all the usual qualities of his voice changes, pitch...

Friday, 14 September 2007

Man How Times Have Changed

I'm sitting here doing some blog management and with no particular inspiration decided not to do a post today. I log out and decide to go and check my Facebook...and it hit me..."man how times have changed" I have about 60 pics of me and my friends on my facebook account, i have numerous pictures of myself all over the internet; at parties, functions, even my work place has managed to post a picture of me somewhere on their website- without my knowledge or permission. I had to laugh because not so long ago i wouldn't even send a pic to a friend via the internet because it could be intercepted by crazy people and be manipulated...blah blah blah blah blah...you get the idea. When i talked on messenger, i used to ignore people i didn't know already,...

Wednesday, 12 September 2007

Sometimes I'm Not A "Girl" Because

1. I like Guinness, and i like it hot and i don't drink "beer"2. I don't see why guys need to put "the seat" back down...we need it down, they need it up, i mean whats the deal3. I don't like pink --------> despite the fact that its taking over my wardrobe4. I think men invented heels bc i hate them and its one other way for them to make women miserable! Which is why i tend to no wear them5. I don't think casual sex should lead to a relationship...i defintely don't think sex means we are in a relationship or heading down that road6. I go out with the guys and drink...and i drink as much as they do :P7. I don't see why my hair must always be perfect...8. I've taken 60 mintues to get ready to go out and that included: washing my hair, drying...

Sugar Daddy Me

This morning, right before i got into work, I work at UWI, i saw this car stop a couple feet in front of me, and out pops a young girl. She looked as though she was in first year (ah the freshers have this young, fresh, expectant look still, not the i want to leave this flipping place look) step out of a car and off to her classes...we hope...i instinctively looked at who was driving (cause me fass a so me stay...lol) i thought, oh cool her dad dropped her off. In the next instant, almost reflexively i thought..."or at least i hope its her dad"...Sigh...I couldn't help but automatically think that this guy could be her man, her sugar daddy. According to Wiki, yes wiki actually has a definition for sugar daddy, can you believe it! A "Sugar Daddy"...

Monday, 10 September 2007

Contact Me

Well I thought I'd give you guys a way to contact me if you so desire About anything, maybe you have a comment thats not related to any particular post, about the blog in general etc. Feel free to say hi.Name:Email:Message:Oh and later on if you come back...i hope you do...then you can always leave a comment in my Contact Me bar on the right ->...about anything...

Application for a "Goodaz"

"Goodaz fi dem gyal you a goodaz fi demgoodaz fi dem gyal you a goodaz fi demso walk out walk out wid you fren (lawd)just look pon dem an singmi back mi back mi back mi back mi back back back (rah)"Tony Matterhorn- "Goodaz" I thought it interesting. The term "goodaz" has been floating around so much, ah what music can do. Some people don't even know what a Goodaz is. This is kinda my idea of what a "Goodaz" is...so check out the application form, hey you can even fill it out and send it in if you like...lol...see if you qualify to be a goodaz.See my application for a "goodaz" here or click this link Application for GoodazYou'll be required to open a word document...don't worry you wont have to save it...

Thursday, 6 September 2007

Things You Are Better Off Not Knowing

document.write(yourName) There are so many scary facts floating around out there, that we really probably would be better off not knowing about. But...since I know and i feel a tinge of "bad mind", and knowledge is in fact power and i want everyone to have the opportunity to experience the joys of power (the wonderful person i am), I thought I'd share.So here is a list of some of the things we really would have been better off not knowing. Yes, these are all true, according to some study somewhere. I don't want to shock you too much so I'll just give you about five today.1. On average, your office desk has 400 times more bacteria than your toilet. Yes, your office desk, the one you are sitting at now, while you are reading this, and probably...

Wednesday, 5 September 2007

I Think my Boss is....

I don't want to say crazy. I mean, its not nice to say people are crazy but she drives me crazy and she knows it. I've manged to, over the years, get a hold of my tongue, to some extent. I no longer just say what i want, how i feel, whenever i want. I hear that's what makes us civil and tolerable and stuff like that, that's, well, people say, important. What i haven't, however, managed to do is...(sigh) mask my feelings on my face. What I'm thinking shows, especially if I'm thinking any of the above things, "what the f^&K are you talking about", "you are so annoying me right now", "go away", "i just spent 3 months working on that and it was fine the last 300 times i carried it to you for approval, what the f*@!k you mean you want...changed?!"...

Friday, 31 August 2007

Jamaican Hottie Hotties

The other day while going home from work I encountered an interesting young lady. I had just walked out to catch a taxi. While I was walking towards the bus stop, i noticed her. She was a slim, short, brown girl. I imagine most men would think her attractive, not wow, but, she was dressed neatly and nicely and she looked pleasant. I noticed her particularly because i took interest in the handbag she had strewn over her shoulder. That's how i am, i love accessories, anyway, since i liked her handbag i decided to take in some more of her outfit.The handbag that started the next series of events was a beautiful brown guess handbag. This was part of an outfit that included, mini Guess Jeans skirt, brand named, blouse, shoes, and belt to boot....

Thursday, 30 August 2007

Things We Say That We Don't Really Mean

People tend to just say things off the top of their heads without thinking about it. I've been victim to this truth so many times myself, its just things that we are so accustomed to saying, its what we've been taught to say, its what comes naturally, its part of society's norms, but if you think about half these things, do we really mean what we say?Take for example the following scenarios:1. Someone accidentally opens the door the the toilet that you are in the middle of using, (most likely if you fall prey to a weak bladder and are forced to use public conveniences) and says to you "oh, i'm sorry"Most people's natural reaction is to say " Oh, thats OK" But come on, do you really mean that? Ok, if its fine let me do it again! We know you don't really mean its ok but we say it anyway.2. You...

Wednesday, 29 August 2007

What being bored at work does

An Ode to Sleepby Me.Oh sleephow doth triest to conquer meBut alas!Above thee i shalt riseThou hath maketh me weekBut alas!I doth not concedeIn my weakest stateshalt mine eyyes lift to bloggerIn my weakest stateShalt my fingers typeIn mmy weakest statedoth does maketh me shun mine true workBut over all mine bodyThou shalt not prevailI shalt dispel thine annointingI shalt maketh a postI shalt overcome thee!Alas, thine only reprieve and victoryshalt beethI shalt maketh a post that doth maketh no sense.F...

Miss Teen USA, Miss South Carolina- Related to President Bush?

I wish people would not tell me about these things...I really honestly wish they wouldnt, but they do and, sigh, its just sad. Here is Miss South Carolina in the Miss Teen USA attemptin to answer the judges question. First...WatchHere is President Bush trying to answer a question from the media at a press conferenceSeems like they are in fact blood relatives right, as close as father and daughter.Neway my first reaction to the Teen Miss Carolina was "WHAT THE ..." Seriosuly, my question is, how did she manage to win the Miss Teen Carolina Pagent...they clearly did not have a question and answer segment. Nehoo after being completely stumped i figured i try and decipher/translate what she was trying to say:First reference to Osama- she realized she didnt have a clue but she had swatted an aswer...

Monday, 27 August 2007

what you see is Not what you get

Usually, we are pretty much able to trust our eyes, but , technology is making it increasingly impossible to trust anything...anything! What you see is definitely not what you get.Woman, for example to lengths in an effort to "catch a man", they put on so much, that at the end of the day, if they do catch a man, when they remove everything the poor guy would not even recognize the person standing in front of him. Technology has made it possible for us women to temporarily alter our appearances.Man, we have amassed such a large inventory of things (sorry to divulge the secrets ladies but..):padded bras/ push up braspadded underwearmake upeye lashesweaves, braids and extensionssiliconeliposuction...I could go on forever...Some things we have...

Thursday, 23 August 2007

More Things to do When Bored

1. Practice all your foreign accents. This should last a little time. German and British are two of my favourite, try italian and Russian too, and add your own words to make it even more fun.2. Try and prove that 1+1 is equal to 4, or any other random number you can think of.3. Plan the life of an imaginary child. Start with sex, and name. Go through each year straight up to and after college.4. Make Origami. Its acutally quite fun. It took me a very long time to get that blaster bird right. So this one should keep you occupied for a while.5. Sit and write persoanlized email to all the people in your address book who you actually know. Send a message to all the people you can't figure out who they are and ask them where you know them from.6....

Things I've leanrt Because of Hurricane Dean

1. You only NEED five 160z cups of water to bathe.2. It is invariably better to live in Kingston, especially Kgn 6.3. Your cellphone although never used, will lose battery power at an alarmingly fast rate.4. There will always be some idiot outside with an umbrealla trying to fix something during the passage of the hurricane.5. Its a good time to practice holding your bladder for as long as you can.6. Don't fry an egg.7. Using your secret mind power from Things to do when bored Is a whole lot of fun when there is a hurricane.8. Its a lot easier to go through ur neighbour's garbage pan when all the contents are flying all over the place.9. After a hurricane surprisingly is the only time the Garbage Truck comes on the right day and at the right...

Saturday, 18 August 2007

Hurricane Dean Campaigning for PNP or JLP

DisclaimerThis post is not in any way meant to try and convince anybody to vote for either party in the upcoming general elections. The author of this post is neither affiliated with the JLP or the PNP. this post is meant purely for humour and should be taken as such.If Hurricane Dean does NOT CHANGE COURSE it will definitely be making land over Jamaica by Sunday. If Dean does not change course, then it will be imminent disaster for Jamaica, i would imagine. I couldn't help but notice that the PNP's tag line for this year's general elections is "NOT CHANGING COURSE". How ironic. Is Dean a forewarning for us? If we dont change course then, well, disaster. I don't believe signs, but i find it hilarious and quite ironic that Dean comes a week...

Friday, 17 August 2007

itsey bitsey, teeny weeny, HUGELY ANNOYING things

I am easily annoyed, i've been constanly told by the people closest to me, and they should know. But i cannot fathom how people arent annoyed by the things that annoy me. Is it too hard to ask people to be...well a lot of things, so maybe its too much to ask. In any case here are some of those little things that annoy me.1. I hate it when i open a door to let myself in our out, and the people on the other side just push past me when i open the door. HELLO i didn't open the door for u, you got ur own blastd hands, open the door ur darn self! You see him? that's the doorman, thats what i'd look like if i was opening the door for you, don't get it twisted.2. It annoys me when the stupid taxi comes along and keeps blowin ghis horn, over and over...

Thursday, 16 August 2007

The Life of a Jamaican Taxi- Part 3

Part One Part two Hey everybody. Man, it’s been raining cats and dogs lately. Trust me, definitely not my favourite time at all. Things get very different around here when it rains. It’s sad all round and a bit scary too. I’m constantly in fear that I will get damaged. First of all, everybody comes and plops their wet derrières on my seats. It's quite nasty actually, everybody with varying degrees of wetness and smells. Thats the nice way of putting it, wetness and smells, yes thats it...i wish so much that i could dunk my head in my engine oils, thats a much better smell than what i was experiencing the other day. Thank God my owner, Redis, had the good sense of mind to air me out after all the rains and buy me a "nice smelling air freshener"...

Wednesday, 15 August 2007

Me According to Tickle

Your lips say you've got Flirty Ways What Do Your Lips Say About You? Brought to you by Tic...

Check Out the Story...

I’d start by massaging my breasts then I’d trail a line straight down to between my thighs...Follow This Link to read the R...

Tuesday, 14 August 2007

Me and Jamaincan Politics

I am going to write a post relating to politics...I just came home and i spent a good portion of the night listening to and involving my self in arguments about politics; against my better judgment.Nehoo the conclusion i came to is this:This country is not going to change until the politics of the country changes. The party politics thing is what i cannot deal with in this country. I think it hardly matters which party is in power because the same corruption and processes will prevail. Majority of the voting public are persons who are not concerned with the issues but instead chose to vote for 'their party" regardless of what that party stands for, no logic or thought goes into it. The ideology is that "i was born into PNP/JLP and that's where i will stay" its ridiculous. Unfortunately the...

A Tragic Comedy

This was an article i read in the Daily Gleaner, yesterday, August 13, 2007. I just had to share. A murder most 'fowl' - Hundreds of chickens die in heartbreaker published: Monday | August 13, 2007 BERLIN, Germany (Reuters):Three hundred chickens died in panic early yesterday when a drunken German teenager on a joyride crashed a van into their shed, police said."Apparently, some of the chickens were so desperate to get away that they ran into the wall and died," the spokesman said. "Others suffered heart attacks."The 17-year-old from the western city of Kassel crashed the van through the wall of a shed containing around 1,000 birds and then returned to a nearby fairground where he was staying, according to a spokesman for the local...

Monday, 13 August 2007

When Technology Fights Back

The other day I was in an office and a young lady was trying, beyond all hope to print something. She sent the document to the printer a few times but, to her dismay, the thing just would not print. Eventually, she figured it must be something with the setting on the printer. She proceeded to get up and alter the settings. Hmmm, good idea i thought but the printer it seemed had other plans. I don't even know why all of this happened to catch my attention, but I'm quite glad it did, because for the next couple of minutes i was thoroughly amused. The poor young lady kept changing different things on the printer, to no avail. First she changed the tray, but for some strange reason, it kept skipping back to the default. She was getting quite furious,...

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